Daily Diary – 2/19/18

Why I Write These:

This is an initiative I started in 2018 to begin documenting my life better. It’s meant to be a snapshot of a day both for public disclosure of what is going on, both good and hard things in my life. It also serves as a record that I hope to be able to look back on in future years. This concept was inspired by my grandfather, Leon Milton Buttermore, who has a memory that I am envious of, and I hope that by doing this I am able to be the kind of man who starts to treasure the things given him.

Daily Highlights:

Godly thought of the day:

Joshua 1:16-18 says: “Then they answered Joshua, ‘Whatever you have commanded us  we will do, and wherever you send us we will go. Just as we fully obeyed Moses, so we will obey you. Only may the Lord your God be with you as he was with Moses. Whoever rebels against your word and does not obey your words, whatever you may command them, will be put to death. Only be strong and courageous!’

While I may be spectacularly wrong about this, this part of Joshua 1 stood out to me in my study today. I thought there were many great themes in the first chapter.

But this response from the Reubenites, Gadites, and half-tribe of Manasseh is unnerving. The unnerving thing is these moments as they speak to Joshua. “The Lord your God… Whoever rebels against your word and does not obey your words, whatever you may command them…”

That scares me. It sets the whole tone for what is to come. A significant portion of Israel still doesn’t see the Lord as their God. They don’t understand Joshua’s words are God’s words. It’s foreshadowing of the fact that these people have no real attachment to the Lord, and though they are faithful for now, it just shows us what happens when we forget where a pastor, or author, or someone else’s authority comes from and is based out of. We must never find any other source more breathtaking than Scripture, and we must always strive to remember to give credit where credit is due. Lest we put stock in a human figurehead and stray if we lose distance from that person.

Favorite meeting of the day:

Talking with Beverly Loos is one of my favorite parts of the week! She helps me print off my lessons for Living Sacrifices, and we just chat up the breeze. Today we talked about funeral songs among other things and what we’d want played at them. Just normal conversations around UBC, I suppose?

Hardest part of my day:

Just got overwhelmed getting home and being alone. I was out and about and very busy and feeling very good. Sometimes it is almost dizzying to return to an apartment by myself. I have to reorient my heart very much towards God and remember His presence that is near and comforting. Otherwise, my heart starts to reach out for false comforts. Sometimes just walking in my apartment door feels like getting hit with a hammer.

Favorite moment of the day:

I didn’t really get to experience it much, but it started raining and I wanted to put my new rain jacket to the test! I actually hardly got rained on, but still I was just excited that it was raining. I guess I just found beauty in the small things there, and think the Lord is amazing that He has created all these different types of weather we experience. We think there so normal, but surely God could have come up with weirder types of weather. What about little pockets of fire that float around and hit you. It would be like a video game. He could have done that, but he chose this weather. I think it just shows that he only uses things in nature that have a purpose. Of course, fire does have a purpose and is being reserved for that day.

What was the weather like today?:

As mentioned, it was rainy and overcast and lovely! I wish it had rained more so I could stand outside in my rainproof jacket and defy the weather as I shake my fist up to the heavens!

Most unfaithful moment of my day:

I interrupted a conversation while I stopped off at UBC to get things printed off. I thought a comment I had for one of the staff members was so clever and funny that I kind of barged in on a conversation to make sure I relayed it. That probably wasn’t the best. You know, I need to start apologizing for these things more. That’s probably the next step in this section of my post. Taking responsibility and mortifying even “small” sin is a good step to take.

What am I currently reading?:

Daily Bible Reading – Numbers 11-13

Dangerous Calling by Paul Tripp – No reading for this today.

Church History by Eusebius – No reading for this today. It will be a periodical read at best.

Addictions: A Banquet in the Grave by Ed Welch – Going to read a bit before bed.

On the Incarnation by Athanasius – No reading for this today.

No Place for Truth: Or Whatever Happened to Evangelical Theology? by David F. Wells – Got through the foreword. I think this will be a difficult read. There’s something about his writing that feels like it is cumbersome and not nimble to read through. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it is a thing.

What was for dinner?:

Fajitas! With water. Fancy!

Song of the day:

I Believe by Wes King – I simultaneously love and dislike the line “I believe because he made me believe.” On one hand, it accurately depicts the saving grace and mercy solely given to me because Jesus looked down on me and smiled, despite the fact I had no merit before Him and pick me. I dislike it because it almost evokes the common misconception that Jesus brings some to salvation kicking and screaming. But overall, I love where Wes went with that line. I think the idea that God breathed into me is just overwhelming. Me. Poor, little Jacob. Dead on the coroner’s table. God looked at that dead corpse that had rebelled against Him and loved me. That’s insane. I can’t fathom it, and I’m glad I have a God I can’t fathom. That’s the only kind of God worthy of my worship.

Quote of the day:

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” — Joshua 1:9. I couldn’t think of something someone said today that stood out, but this will do in a pinch, right? The Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. With a God like this, who will stand against me?   

Prayer of the day:

Oh God, remind me that I rely on your presence to sustain me at all times. I could have every relationship apart from you and it would be meaningless without you. You are my northern star, my compass point, my solid anchor. Without you I am but a breath, a vapor, and a mist that will evaporate into meaningless, miserable suffering forever. Thank you for choosing me and saving me out of that! 


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